How to cook a Musa Pseudostem

Take a mediumsized Musa Pseudostem Chop it finely and boil till tender Spice it and eat while costiveThere thatrsquos how you do it Irsquove given the recipe away The Musa Pseudostem is the tender inner core or pith of the banana treersquos stem You can now amaze your friends by cooking up a Banana Tree Khich KhachTheyrsquoll nudge each other of course and whisper into their respective ears ldquoGoodness he or she doesnrsquot know which part of the tree is edible Next thing he or she will be serving us Teakwood QuicherdquoDonrsquot be daunted by the mockery because God is on your side He will make them all costive and that will be the end of them When I was little my mother took me aside one day in my grandfatherrsquos sprawling rubber estate in Kerala and said ldquoSee these trees son Some are rubber but many are banana trees Every growing boy needs to eat a banana tree now and then It is excellent for the bowels The rough fibres of the banana stem act like a powerful broom cleaning out the folds and crevices of your plicae circularesrdquoThat was how I first tasted Banana Tree Khich Khach for want of a better nameI fell in love with it and wanted to eat it every day ldquoMother motherrdquo I said to her ldquoThis stuff is so good for my bowels that I want more and more of it I donrsquot want no banana fritters I donrsquot want no bananas I donrsquot want no banana leaf all I want is some of that olrsquo Banana Tree Khich KhachrdquoLetrsquos talk about Bombai Click the QR code above to join my WhatsApp group to share your Bombai stories for my bookmdashand perhaps answer some of my Bombai questionsldquoOnce a month is all you getrdquo she said sternly ldquoNo one should eat it more than once a month and less than once a month is asking for trouble Besides it is a nuisance to cook and moreover I donrsquot love it that much Overbesides your bowels arenrsquot that badrdquoYou can get banana pseudostems in Matunga in Bombay They look like pale white plastic plumbing pipes shiny and smooth outside and usually cut into onefoot segments In those preInternet days I dialled my mother who was in Chicago with her daughter that particular day and asked her exactly how much I should buy Shersquos terrible with quantities like all mothers and she thought for a minute while the dollars ticked by Then she said ldquoAbout oneandahalf Ponds talcum powder tins to feed about fiverdquo How perfectmdasha banana pseudostem does resemble a cylindrical talcum tinBuy the banana pseudostem carefully Check for discolourationsmdashthere should be nonemdashand ensure that it is tender and white Cutting it is an art best mastered through practice Oil your hands because the pseudostem exudes a sticky pseudogoo that is immune to soap Peel away about two thick layers of the outer skin about a centimetre or two deep to expose the tender white pith within This is the part you willcook and eatSlice into discs about four millimetres thick and plop into water to which yoursquove added half a cup of sour buttermilk to prevent discolouration Pay attention to the lengths of lsquostringrsquo that unwind as you cut They should be assiduously removed and discardedHerersquos how you make the Khich KhachIngredients15 banana pseudostems prepared as described and cut into discs1 cup tuvar dalA little ural dalA pinch of turmericA pinch of salt1 tablespoon rice3 or 4 red chillies12 coconut grated12 teaspoon mustard seeds12 tablespoon jeeraSome curry leaves1 Finely chop the banana pseudostem discs2 Pressure cook the chopped banana pseudostem together with one cup tuvar dal and some turmeric with salt to taste Maybe five whistles of a pressure cooker3 Meanwhile take a tablespoon of rice three red chillies and fry in oil till just before the rice begins to redden Grind to a paste with the grated coconut and the jeera4 Combine this paste with the pressurecooked banana pseudostem and tuvar dal adding some water if the result feels too thick Let the Khich Khach come to a boil over a slow fire The banana pseudostem absorbs the various subtleties in the coconut paste and emerges dressed to party5 Throw a half teaspoon of mustard seeds into hot oil or ghee When it begins to pop add a half teaspoon of urad dal As the dal begins to turn a lovely golden colour add a few whole red chillies just for a few moments and then throw the whole thing over the Khich Khach as a garnishIt is now time to answer the question that has been distracting you What you are wondering is the meaning of the word lsquocostiversquo mentioned so casually in the first paragraph No it is not another word for the price index but simply meansmdashoh I couldnrsquot possibly Go look it up everyone has Google these daysIf yoursquore too busy or lazy for that just make the Khich Khach and give your family a treatYou can reach C Y Gopinath at cygopigmailcomSend your feedback to mailbagmiddaycomThe views expressed in this column are the individualrsquos and donrsquot represent those of the 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